For Twos this means that they can have a wing One (also known as Enneagram 2w1) or a wing Three (Enneagram 2w3).
Below you find descriptions for each wing. We will explore how either wing can positively influence your main personality type as well as the specific challenges this combination brings with it. If you are new to wings and want to learn more about how they work, you can read our introduction to wings here.
What do you get when you combine the warmth and empathy of Twos with the moral seriousness of Ones? If we had to give this combination a name (which we won’t, because then we would have to come up with 18 additional names), it would probably be „The Good Samaritan“.
You get some true altruism here.
As extroverted as Twos usually are, with a One wing they can become more comfortable with working in the background without drawing too much attention to themselves. But since Twos always enjoy the feeling of being important in other people’s lives, they can feel awkward – their Two nature tells them “please see me“, while the moral voice of their One wing says “oh please, it’s nothing, don’t look at me“.
As a result of this, what you also get with this wing is a tendency to self-criticism and and a bigger strain on their ability to take care of their personal needs – because now those come into conflict with their principles. The stronger their One wing, the harder it can become for them to empathize with people. Instead, they can be more judgemental, of themselves as well as of others, mostly when it’s about their highest ideal: love. They can feel so compelled to do right by others that they begin to struggle with feelings of guilt much more than Twos with a Three wing.
The good thing is, on a healthy level this wing elevates Twos to truly selfless servants who have a strong desire to put an end to human suffering.
If you feel like the Two type reflects your experience, but you don’t feel as emotionally charged and strongly driven by your principles as well as your desire to help, that could be your One wing.
Mix a little bit of the Three personality into the Two type, and what do you get? A more confident, charming and maybe even a bit seductive personality flavour. Twos with a Three wing are often more ambitious concerning their personal goals. At least, a tad bit more than Twos with a One wing, who incorporate the self-critical, idealistic aspects of Ones rather than the image-conscious, competitive traits of Threes.
Twos are always relationship-driven. But with a Three wing, this drive isn’t displayed in the form of serving and taking care of others, but rather in thinking that their friendship and attention is already enough of a gift to others. The great thing about this wing is that instead of giving others what they need at the cost of their own needs, these kinds of Twos are more comfortable simply sharing the innate qualities they already have – and enjoying the friendship and admiration it gets them. They’re able to be more direct about what they want and vocal about the services they provide.
Cultivating their network, something all Twos do, can be a bit more about who they know and how it makes them look than about simply being important in the lives of others. It makes them more concerned with their own desirability and status, and when they get manipulative (as unhealthy Twos can), it is usually to avoid humiliation and assure people still like them.
Lucky for them, healthy Twos with a Three wing are still concerned about others as much as their basic type promises – their self-esteem just isn’t tied as closely to their service but more to their personal qualities.
If you notice that, next to your most basic motivation as a Two, you also find a lot of ambition for your personal goals and a focus on connections rather than moral principle, the Three wing is most likely your stronger one.
I just got 2w1/3 balanced Wings?? And I am an INFJ-T?? Please explain so I can understand 😔
Personally being a 2w1 or even adding elements of that empathy to my personality is such a goal. I find that I get very lost in the general pursuit of success at times that my personal relationships feel a little bit neglected if that makes sense? I want to be able to empathize more with the people that I care about and ensure that I'm communicating that. Forging an actual deeper connection with the people I care about is important to me but I'm not always the best at expressing that concept to them. This is something I'm setting as a goal.
What a wild time it must be to be a 2w3...I can see these people as being the "serial dater" athletic types. Just someone who is very much pursuing their personal agenda and goals while at the same time trying to make as many connections as possible in life. I wonder if the negative aspects of this personality is the inability to make deeper meaningful connections? I can see that as having friendships and relationships that can be stepping stones rather than actual enriching interactions and connections. This one definitely has me pondering a bit over my coffee this morning.
Very interesting to see that Mother Teresa was an Enneagram 2w1. Based on the explanation she seems to fit the bill perfectly. Being an empathetic good samaritan personality type - she just might be the quintessential example in my humble opinion. I feel like an Enneagram 2w1 or displaying the characteristics of one is something to be proud of. I feel like society as a whole can benefit more from having more "feeling" toward their fellow man. Though it seems like there is a fine balance with that personality type as you can be consumed by becoming a "people - pleaser."...this is a bit to think about.